This is a letter looking for a scholarship for Hope's training. The lady that wrote me back suggested posting our story on her Facebook page. I couldn't figure out how to do it right, so it got turned into a blog, and I will post a blog link there instead. I feel like I am really putting myself out there, much more then I want to be. However this battle has forced me to get a bit creative, so here is the basics of what I am thinking.
5/17/11
Hello,
My name is Charmine and Hope is my girl. I rescued her from a Southern ID animal shelter last fall. I fell in love with pit bulls 20+ years ago, but the time was never right for my own. I have been battling St 4 breast cancer since Aug of 2009. In Nov of 2010, I spent a weekend in Butte, and was reminded of 2 things. My own pit bull was on my bucket list, and the therapeutic value of dogs. Needless to say, I started searching the Internet for a pibble to adopt as soon as I got back to my laptop. So many choices!
Then comes Hope! I found her on Petfinder, simply listed with a picture as a female pit bull mix, 2-3 years old- as an owner surrender. She was scheduled to be euthanized 2 days before I found her ad. The shelter was closed by then, so I emailed them to see if she was still alive. The ad also stated that she was good with dogs, cats and people. That was it. First thing Friday morning, I was back looking again, and had forgotten about the dog I had emailed about. I talked to a local rescue and was thinking about a mixed puppy, which really wasn't what I wanted. Then my husband reminded me about that email. I called the shelter and shelter told me she was still alive, but would be put down on Sunday. Shelter person told me the same thing the ad did. I was quite nervous, having never owned my own dog before. I couldn't understand why she was being put down, if she was so good. I showed my friend the ad, and asked him to call again...just to see if we got a different answer. Different person, same answer. As nervous as I was, (Mom IS a worry wart!) I knew that I had to go get her. I figured if she really was too much for me to handle, that we would save her and find her a more experienced home if need be. So off I went for a 16 hour round trip to go get her!
I told the shelter I was coming, and made arrangements to meet the animal control officer after hours to pick her up. Into the room I went to go meet her. All the other dogs were barking..except this beautiful girl. She was more interested in eating the boxer's kibble next to her, which had spilled out into her cage. She stopped and her attention was all mine when I found her. I knew right then that her name was Hope. Hope for a furever home for her, and Hope for me. See, my doctor told me a couple weeks before that with stage 4 recurrent breast cancer, his best guess was I have between 2 and 10 years left to live. I made up my mind right then that she was going to live a ripe old age, and I was going to out live her! The shelter was very kind, and did not charge us her adoption fee, once they found out that she was my bucket list dog.
Hope is my girl. She stays right by my side. My goal for her is to become a certified therapy dog, so we can go spread Hope in the cancer center. She is a very good girl, just needs more socializing and training. Mom needs more training, to build Mom's confidence that she is training Hope right. Since I adopted Hope, we had to move into a friend's basement. I have had a very rough couple of years, and have since divorced my husband. So now we live with a rottweiler and a young lab. We do good with the other dogs, but not perfect as they are un-neutered, and un-trained males. Currently we are working with Wind River Tails & Trails for boarding and training.
The dilemma is this. My doctor has put me on disability for an undetermined amount of time. I called WRTT, and had them max out my credit card to start training Hope. I believe that they are already giving us a discounted rate. Due to the other dog/children situation in the house, I chose to have Hope boarded while I visited my grandmother, and again when I go to a much needed breast cancer retreat next week. I figured this was a much better option then spending it on training, then taking a chance on something bad happening while I was gone. I have $40 left on my tab after boarding. So I have enough for 1 more training session, which will involve strange dog training, for lack of better terms. I am probably short about $1000 to get her trained and certified. I am quite stressed between her and I both needing more training. I am terrified something bad will happen, if I don't get her trained. Mom is really lost right now, and I need something positive to focus on now, so I can heal myself. Both Hope and I really need a "job" to do, and I believe therapy work is what both of us need, and soon!
My other concern with Hope is also to get her trained well, in case my cancer doesn't shape up and ship out. Not happening, but I do have to be realistic as far as Hope is concerned. If something were to happen to me, I would want her to continue on as a therapy dog if possible. I know that her being well trained, will make a huge difference in who's home she would go to live if something were to happen to me. She is my only child, and she is a very special girl. I know, aren't they all?
So when I ran across your Facebook page, I thought maybe you could help. What I am looking for is a scholarship, or charity type assistance to help with Hope's training. I have been looking on the internet, but am not running across anything that we would be applicable for. Do you have any ideas, or resources that I can check into? Thank you for getting involved and being there for pibbles in MT! I didn't run across your site when I started searching. Thanks so much for your time!
Sincerely, Charmine and Hope
6/2/11 PS-Since I have written the above note, I have created a Facebook page for Hope. We share my blog, as 2 blogs is too much for me. There is a donation button on the bottom of our blog. I feel really uncomfortable having it there, but I am at a loss on what to do. I am in the process of looking for someone to help me design a logo for Charmine's Hope. With this logo, I hope to start selling t-shirts etc. to start generating some income. I am on a very small disability, and will not be going back to my prior source of income. These (hopeful) monies will be first and foremost used to finish Hope's training, and yes- to put some extra monies in my own pocket. Then when Hope and I are back on track, I would like to continue with the fundraising efforts to pay it forward to some very worthy breast cancer foundations. 2 that have touched me personally are Tough Enough to Wear Pink, and Lotus Survival Foundation.
You see, these foundations help take care of survivors in the HERE AND NOW. These are not foundations raising money for a cure. Yes, the cure is very important, but I don't believe they are lacking in as much funding as the here and now. For me personally, finances were and still are my number 1 stress factor. My disability check does not allow for any extras at all. If I am in this boat, I know many others are as well. How many of us go with out the extra vitamin supplements, that help us keep our immune system and energy levels up, because Medicaid and insurance doesn't cover it? What about eating better, which means I should be buying organic when applicable. What about dealing with the mind and soul aspect of things? Many cancer centers offer additional therapies for free. Sadly, Missoula does not appear to have much available. This is something I would like to work on, when I get back on track. This means I have to earn income in a more creative way, so I have the time and energy to work on other projects. Many of us have clothing issues due to surgery scars, and weight gain or loss. What about even just some extra gas money to get out of the house and see a dear friend, or a book about dealing with cancer. Please don't think I am complaining, as I do have it better now, much more then a year ago.
A year ago, I was married and strapped as financially tight as could be. My husband owned a business in a very bad economy, so I did not qualify for Montana's Breast & Cervical Program. Everything had to be paid for out of pocket. Medicaid wouldn't touch me at that point either. I had to call and cancel 3 different times (in tears) just for an appointment just to find out about breast reconstruction. I felt like I was going to have to walk around lopsided for the rest of my life, because I had made some bad financial decisions somewhere along the way and couldn't come up with $125 for a consultation to find out how much reconstruction would cost. These are just some of the obvious things that financially strapped survivors may be going without. I can only imagine what the other unspoken needs are, and most of us prefer to be pretty quiet about these needs. I personally do not want to ask for help, unless I can offer something in return. I don't have a lot to offer in return right now, just a lot of promises to pay it forward when I get back on my feet.
So as you can see, things are looking up. I do have a small disability check, and Medicaid is now picking up the tab. I have Hope in many more ways then one. I am taking all I am learning and trying to hold onto it, so I can help guide someone else down the road. This cancer is my blessing, and I know that I am becoming a much better quality of person along this journey. I can see that I do make a difference in other's lives, and I will continue to do so. I never asked to take this journey, but I walk my path willingly and graciously.
