Went in for some afternoon labs today. We got an afternoon appointment, because it was just labs and a quick check in with my onc- since I'm not on chemo at the moment. I was quite happy to notice a little pep in my step as I was sitting down in a chair. A chair on the edge of the first bay, like I was ready to do a mad dash out of there. Which I was- for a moment. I don't know if it was because I wasn't getting chemo, or it wasn't 10am, or most likely- the chemo is finding it's way out of me again. Whatever, it was better and I carried on for awhile with the lady I plopped down next to.
She was on her fifth round, so she is pretty new still. Nice lady, easy to talk to and full of spunk. Plus, Nurse J headed over to take care of me today- you can't be sad around her! We were all caring on about how good we felt, and how we just wished it could be the same for everyone else. About that time, I realised the elder woman across the way was not doing so hot. First I feel like crap because I have been just carrying on and maybe not being so considerate of someone else, and then just helpless because I just couldn't see how to make her feel better.
The moment passed and she was shuffling around a bit in her chair, so I asked her if her ears were cold and she needed a hat. Poor thing already had on a jacket and 2 blankets. She was good without a hat, but she did allow me to come put her recliner back in an upright position for her. She was feeling much better now, and so I moved to a closer chair so I could hear her better. We talked for awhile while she finished up and I waited for my doc. She started shuffling again, and I went over and she let me get her shoes and slip them on her feet. She even let me take a couple of her juice cups and get them out of the way. Lots of times people don't need help, and it made my day that there was something I could do for her, even if it was so little. I believe she said that she had pancreatic cancer, and they had just buried her husband the week before. So strong, and so spirited. It made me tear for a moment, as I realised that this dreaded disease will probably take this lady out. There was no mention of it, just a little bit of her story. I had already seen her daughter come in and check on her, and leave again. I believe that her daughter has got her hands as about full as they get, from what her mom had shared with me. I got comfy in my chair for awhile longer, as I knew that I wasn't leaving the chemo ward until I got in the elevator with this woman and her daughter.
That is exactly what happened. We chatted, and next thing we knew- her bag was empty. Her daughter couldn't have timed it any better by the time she arrived. My doc had already came and talked to me by this time, so off we went. I walked out and made sure that they got all settled in their van, before I made my way to my truck. It has been awhile since I have left chemo feeling so fulfilled. I love to visit in chemo, but most times I am chomping at the bit to get out of there after several hours. However on days when I am just in and out of the center- I do take my time and chat my way back out. It has been awhile since I sat with somebody, just to keep them company while waiting for their rides. I could tell that this lady really appreciated it, and so did her daughter. It made for a really nice afternoon.
Oh, you want to know what the doc said do you? Alright, I'll tell! Labs all looked good, and he gave me a report from last weeks labs, as we did run some different things. Vit D level looks good, and not to quit my D supplements. He ran test and I am definitely post menopausal (chemo induced). We knew this already, but now there is no second guessing. He did talk to the doctor in Billings, and between the 2 of them- they just really don't see the need for a second biopsy. He did agree with her that yes indeed, the
CMF regiment would be good to try. I'm not sure why we haven't done this one already- other then I think it might be a pretty old school drug that still has good success rates. I get the idea that normally a CMF treatment is done much earlier in the game then this. My Onc says it's not that hard of a chemo. I am game, as once again this regiment has it's own battle program that sounds different then the others. My Onc is still waiting for her notes to get sent over, so I'm not sure if I am expecting any more new ideas from the Billings Onc. However, I think Doc and I had another feel good visit today, so yay! Oh and, when I asked what would be reasonable to expect from the current hormone therapy- what I got was this. We can hope for shrinkage, but I don't think we should hold our breath. What we can hope for is no more growth, for it to at least hold steady for awhile while I take a break from chemo.
Oh and, the funny guy- said my tumor markers look, "normal" as his parting shot. I think he was happy that I laughed, and said I understood. Understood meant- he knew I was going to look at him asking what is "normal". Yes, I did refrain on purpose, as he was almost free of me. However, I might have a slightly better understanding of normal then he might think I do. Nah, probably not. My understanding is that tumor markers are based on individual levels of something in out blood. Meaning each person's markers are unique to their own system. Since that was the first reading, there will be nothing to compare it to, until today's labs were drawn. I know that wasn't everything that his look entailed, but I think I finally have an understanding of this much.
OK, enough for now. I'm happy to have gotten you all a timely update for once! Take care, and keep on keepin' on folks!
She was on her fifth round, so she is pretty new still. Nice lady, easy to talk to and full of spunk. Plus, Nurse J headed over to take care of me today- you can't be sad around her! We were all caring on about how good we felt, and how we just wished it could be the same for everyone else. About that time, I realised the elder woman across the way was not doing so hot. First I feel like crap because I have been just carrying on and maybe not being so considerate of someone else, and then just helpless because I just couldn't see how to make her feel better.
The moment passed and she was shuffling around a bit in her chair, so I asked her if her ears were cold and she needed a hat. Poor thing already had on a jacket and 2 blankets. She was good without a hat, but she did allow me to come put her recliner back in an upright position for her. She was feeling much better now, and so I moved to a closer chair so I could hear her better. We talked for awhile while she finished up and I waited for my doc. She started shuffling again, and I went over and she let me get her shoes and slip them on her feet. She even let me take a couple of her juice cups and get them out of the way. Lots of times people don't need help, and it made my day that there was something I could do for her, even if it was so little. I believe she said that she had pancreatic cancer, and they had just buried her husband the week before. So strong, and so spirited. It made me tear for a moment, as I realised that this dreaded disease will probably take this lady out. There was no mention of it, just a little bit of her story. I had already seen her daughter come in and check on her, and leave again. I believe that her daughter has got her hands as about full as they get, from what her mom had shared with me. I got comfy in my chair for awhile longer, as I knew that I wasn't leaving the chemo ward until I got in the elevator with this woman and her daughter.
That is exactly what happened. We chatted, and next thing we knew- her bag was empty. Her daughter couldn't have timed it any better by the time she arrived. My doc had already came and talked to me by this time, so off we went. I walked out and made sure that they got all settled in their van, before I made my way to my truck. It has been awhile since I have left chemo feeling so fulfilled. I love to visit in chemo, but most times I am chomping at the bit to get out of there after several hours. However on days when I am just in and out of the center- I do take my time and chat my way back out. It has been awhile since I sat with somebody, just to keep them company while waiting for their rides. I could tell that this lady really appreciated it, and so did her daughter. It made for a really nice afternoon.
Oh, you want to know what the doc said do you? Alright, I'll tell! Labs all looked good, and he gave me a report from last weeks labs, as we did run some different things. Vit D level looks good, and not to quit my D supplements. He ran test and I am definitely post menopausal (chemo induced). We knew this already, but now there is no second guessing. He did talk to the doctor in Billings, and between the 2 of them- they just really don't see the need for a second biopsy. He did agree with her that yes indeed, the
CMF regiment would be good to try. I'm not sure why we haven't done this one already- other then I think it might be a pretty old school drug that still has good success rates. I get the idea that normally a CMF treatment is done much earlier in the game then this. My Onc says it's not that hard of a chemo. I am game, as once again this regiment has it's own battle program that sounds different then the others. My Onc is still waiting for her notes to get sent over, so I'm not sure if I am expecting any more new ideas from the Billings Onc. However, I think Doc and I had another feel good visit today, so yay! Oh and, when I asked what would be reasonable to expect from the current hormone therapy- what I got was this. We can hope for shrinkage, but I don't think we should hold our breath. What we can hope for is no more growth, for it to at least hold steady for awhile while I take a break from chemo.
Oh and, the funny guy- said my tumor markers look, "normal" as his parting shot. I think he was happy that I laughed, and said I understood. Understood meant- he knew I was going to look at him asking what is "normal". Yes, I did refrain on purpose, as he was almost free of me. However, I might have a slightly better understanding of normal then he might think I do. Nah, probably not. My understanding is that tumor markers are based on individual levels of something in out blood. Meaning each person's markers are unique to their own system. Since that was the first reading, there will be nothing to compare it to, until today's labs were drawn. I know that wasn't everything that his look entailed, but I think I finally have an understanding of this much.
OK, enough for now. I'm happy to have gotten you all a timely update for once! Take care, and keep on keepin' on folks!
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